Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Lycanthrob




I was drinking at this Moroccan joint one night where there was a belly dancer performing. I was enjoying the show until I noticed her dark happy trail; like a gorilla's arm struggling to pull her bellybutton back into her skirt.

Immediately I thought, "Eww, gross", but then I realized I was already halfway to Bonertown on the PreCum Express. I had to confess that maybe I kind of liked it...

So you can imagine why now, my boner is fighting my right thigh for legroom like my pants were the Gaza Strip.



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Wiiasted Time

This is why God invented YouTube.



I watched it 20 times before I went to bed last night and 10 more times before I left the house this morning. I don't know who the other 21,500+ people who watched this are, but I hope that after I light my face on fire and throw myself over a bridge in front of a moving semi with a bomb strapped to my chest, I get to meet those people in Heaven where we can all talk about it and ROFL over it for eternity.



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Friday, March 6, 2009

My Mutant Power is Pete Wentz

Did you ever wonder what would happen if Wolverine had kids? Well stop. Someone figured it out.

They're a bunch of scrappy teens who spend all of their money at Hot Topic and fucking love Fall Out Boy.





And the older twins are always pissing off their younger brother. It's fucking adorable. Until he gets upset about it and runs off crying, eyeliner streaming down his little baby face, to go hide in the closet where he cuts himself.

Don't worry though - he's Wolverine's son. He'll be fine. That shit will just heal right up and nobody will be the wiser. It's just between him and his Billie Joe Armstrong poster.






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Tuesday, March 3, 2009

LOL! TO MUCH SUGAR I GESS!! LOL!!!



I found this one as a black and white page that was just part of a whole story that was at least one page too long. I then added the color and the text myself because that's what I wish this was actually about.
But it's not. It's really about something far, far worse.



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Monday, March 2, 2009

DMB ROOLZ!!!!

What's hotter than Dave Matthews looking over his shoulder all like, "Hey, what's up"?





How about Dave Matthews looking over his other shoulder at you, all like:


"Hey...


" ...what's up?"






Umm... how about your dick in the pussy I wish I had right now, Dave? Can that be "what's up"?




Cuz you just totally eye-fucked me and I think I kinda liked it.





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Sunday, March 1, 2009

Double Hemipened

According to Wikipedia:

"Although a wide range of reproductive modes are used by snakes; all snakes employ internal fertilization, accomplished by means of paired, forked hemipenes, which are stored inverted in the male's tail. The hemipenes are often grooved, hooked, or spined in order to grip the walls of the female's cloaca."

That's cool. Except they forgot about the part where this happens:





Which sucks big time because I love it when that happens.





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Wednesday, February 25, 2009

May the Dear Lord Bless You



That's sort of what I was asking for... though I suddenly regret asking for it. In fact, looking at this picture now, I regret a lot of things: being born with eyes, owning a computer, dogs, staying up past my bedtime, birthdays... this list goes on...





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